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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26149402">You are not my Kryptonite, You are my Sun</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/natura_non_facit_saltus/pseuds/natura_non_facit_saltus'>natura_non_facit_saltus</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supergirl (TV 2015)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>But these gay idiots are so in love with each other, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Kara is angry, Red Kryptonite, Red Kryptonite Kara Danvers, Smut, they'll have sex in the second chapter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 11:48:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>7,405</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26149402</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/natura_non_facit_saltus/pseuds/natura_non_facit_saltus</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kara is exposed to a new, enhanced Red Kryptonite that consumes her with rage from the get-go.<br/>Not caring about anyone or anything anymore, she abandons her Supergirl duties and finds herself searching for Lena.<br/>As expected, things take a rather heartbreaking turn, leaving both women hurt...and perhaps something more?<br/>Not even poison seems to be able to break them apart because the truth is, Lena is Kara's sun.</p><p>(Takes place some time after Season 5, when Leviathan and Lex are defeated.)</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kara Danvers &amp; Lena Luthor, Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>280</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>You are not my Kryptonite, You are my Sun</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Lesbihonest we all have the hots for angry Kara and what's better than an angry Kara who is a fucking softie for Lena even under the influence of red Kryptonite? Exactly, nothing is better than that. Second chapter will consist completely of smut and fluff.<br/>Enjoy! :)</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"Please don't hurt me, Supergirl."</p><p>He was a pathetic little Maaldorian, begging injured on the ground for her mercy. Funny enough he was all confidence and talk not even a minute ago. There was no worry about the consequences, the alien just wanted to beat some low life drug dealer for not giving him his dose. But in this very moment, the Maaldorian's eyes were wide and filled with fear, his heart was racing.</p><p>That's right. <em>Fear me</em>, the Kryptonian thought. They never valued her when she was nice and forgiving. But <em>now</em>, now they would learn to bow down to her. No more second chances. They didn't deserve her kindness in the first place, no one did. She was meant for big things. Great things. Not running behind everyone's asses in National City. She had already been there, done that as Cat's assistant, as DEO agent, as sister, as friend, as daughter, as lover. And what good did it ever bring her?</p><p>Kara chuckled dryly at his plea. As if she would waste herself like that. That's what she had her sister for. "You think too highly of yourself. You are not worth the punch."</p><p>Her super hearing could already pick up the sound of DEO vans approaching in the distance. They would arrive in the next fifteen seconds. She had to admit it was impressive. They were like parasites, no matter how many hardships they faced, they always came out alive and somehow stronger than before. There was a new DEO building in National City Central and things had gone back to normal after Leviathan and Lex were sent to hell. LuthorCorp went back to its old hands and disjoined from the DEO. So now they acted all high and mighty again, actually believing they were the cities heroes. But they weren't. They were <em>nothing</em> without Kara.</p><p>The ugly creature in front of her tried to pull himself up shakily, just to be pushed down again by her foot. He bowed his head in submission and waited for her next move. <em>Good boy,</em> he learnt quickly. </p><p>"<em>Now</em> you have permission to get up and get out of my sight," she sneered at him as her foot left his body.</p><p>He managed to scramble to his feet and didn't hesitate to turn around and run away like the bitch he was. The Kryptonian didn't bother looking back, she set off into the sky with a thunder like bang. She was tired of everyone. They could all go to hell for all she cared. Kara Zor-El didn't owe anyone anything. </p><p>Just as calculated, Alex and her agents arrived at the scene at the fifteen seconds mark, only to catch sight of a large reptilian like figure at the end of the alley jumping on a dumpster and with that launching itself over the edge of the brick wall and onto the roof of the old gymnastic building. The redhead spoke into her ear piece and notified her strike team which was already waiting on the other side to catch him. She got the message that the alien was captured shortly afterwards and got out of her car. She sighed. One problem down, one bigger to solve now.</p><p>J'onn came to the location in his own car with Dreamer at his side. They rushed to Alex with distressed expressions on their faces. Looking around, both of them realized Supergirl was nowhere to be seen.</p><p>"We need to find her as soon as possible," Alex said. "Brainy, keep me updated."</p><p>"Copy that," the 12th-level intellect spoke in her ear.</p><p>"Red Kryptonite?" J'onn gathered his thoughts with a deep frown.</p><p>"Most likely."</p><p>"How did she get exposed to it?" <em>Great</em> question.</p><p>They had to find Kara and get the poison out of her quickly, before things escalated. There still was time, it couldn't have spread that much already.</p><p>"There was an armed robbery this morning. Kara was shot when she arrived, it didn't penetrate her skin but she said it released a weird smell. We couldn't pick up anything on the radar. I asked her to come to the DEO for a check up, just in case we found something, but she said she was late for work and would come later instead. I let it slide since Kara felt fine." The guilt was eating her alive. It was her fault. She shouldn't have allowed her sister to just leave.</p><p>J'onn nodded in understanding, whereas Dreamer looked more confused than before. "So it was a staged robbery then. Someone was waiting for her to show up," he concluded. It was Alex' first thought too. It <em>had</em> to be planned. But who was capable of doing that? Maxwell Lord? After so many years? It couldn't be. But Lillian was still out there...</p><p>"That's what I was thinking too. We found the bullet Supergirl was targeted with at the scene and examinations didn't show anything, so whoever it was, knew exactly what they were doing. But that's really the least of my worries right now. J'onn, we cannot let the past repeat itself. We <em>need</em> to find her."</p><p>Dreamer cut in, worried about her friend 's health more than anything, "What exactly is red Kryptonite? Is she hurt?"</p><p>"It's synthetically made Kryptonite that gradually takes away all inhibitions when used against a Kryptonian. They become ruthless and capable of anything. Right now, Supergirl or <em>Kara </em>cannot be trusted. We need to stabilize her and give her an antidote."</p><p>"Alright, then lets go. Where is that antidote?"</p><p>"There is an emergency kit at the desert facility but J'onn and I are the only ones who have access to it. It's going to take at least another hour till I go and come back. We can't wait that long."</p><p>Dreamer squeezed her shoulder with an encouraging smile, "J'onn and I will find her, don't worry, Alex." The redhead grasped the hand with her own and smiled halfheartedly back. Dreamer was right. They had to remain positive but that nagging voice in her head insisted what they were doing wasn't enough. And maybe it was right. This was <em>Kara</em>. Not just her sister Kara, but a Kryptonian with powers beyond imagination. As much as Alex loved her, with each passing second she was growing more and more into the biggest threat to National City. After everything she went through and the emotional wounds that were still not healed, there was no telling in what could happen next.</p><p>The redhead excused herself for a moment to make a call. A call to the <em>only</em> person who could help them, no matter the situation. Although she hesitated at first, she knew she had to do it. They still weren't exactly on good terms after the woman betrayed Kara weeks ago, but this was an emergency. And besides, Kara had sort of forgiven her, right? So she needed her best friend. They<em> all</em> did right now.</p><p>-</p><p>Lena was in the midst of a scientific breakthrough when her phone rang. Words cannot describe how much it irritated her when she got disrupted like that during her work but the rational voice inside of her reminded her that calls on her <em>personal</em> phone were usually important. Sometimes even a matter of life and death. She sighed proudly at the sight of a freshly eliminated virus on the microscope slide and stepped back to search for her phone.</p><p><em>Right</em>.</p><p>Where was it again? Having a spacious lab always came with its disadvantages. Lena literally lost things in there on a regular basis. Last time she had to call Kara (x-ray vision is such a great skill to have) because she couldn't find her purse. Turns out it was on her desk all along, hidden from her eyes by a bunch of papers. Thankfully this time the help of her superhero was not needed, the phone was laying on a lab chair nearby. She went to grab it and the name on the display made her freeze on the spot. This <em>definitely</em> couldn't be a good sign. What happened this time?</p><p>Please no world domination again. They had just recovered from two big threats.</p><p>"Lena, hey," the strained voice came through. She wasn't even trying to hide the fact that something was going on.</p><p>"Hello, Alex. Is everything okay?"</p><p>They were still not really on speaking terms, they hadn't even seen each other after Lex was sent to prison but truthfully, Lena didn't blame Alex. She had hurt her sister, of course it would take time for things to go back to normal again. It didn't change the fact that Lena was more than willing to listen to the oldest Danvers sister. They always had a weird relationship with Alex being naturally cautious and fierce, just like Lena, but things were going really well before the Luthor found out about Supergirl's identity. There used to be a mutual respect on a professional and personal level. It was a shame that things had to go downhill. It still hurt though how Alex was a little too quick to shut her out and willing to let her take the fall on several occasions but Kara had always been her biggest priority, the redhead was ready to let others down if it meant to save her sister. If she only knew that Lena would do the same for the blonde...</p><p>"Not really, no...Kara was exposed to red Kryptonite. I don't know who did it and why, and it doesn't matter right now." She took a shaky breath. "The point is, I need your help. <em>Please.</em>"</p><p><em>Oh no</em>. The billionaire daughter wasn't there the first time it had happened but well, she was a <em>Luthor.</em> Of course she heard about it and knew what red Kryptonite was. Her stomach immediately knotted at the thought of Kara in danger. Was she okay right now? Was she in pain?</p><p>Lena wouldn't rest until she found a cure and <em>who</em> did this to her. She was sick and tired of people hurting her best friend. <em>Enough</em>.</p><p>She nodded to herself and answered right away "Of course, I'll come to the DEO right away! Where is she now?"</p><p>Alex hesitated for a second. They had to know where she is, right? "We don't know. The satellite hasn't been able to pick her up for the past two hours. We received a distress signal about a violent Maaldorian five minutes ago and people had spotted him with her but she disappeared before we arrived. "</p><p><em>Huh</em>. That was weird. Kryptonian heat radiation was always traceable. Something was going on and Lena paced around her lab to figure out <em>what</em> it was. Focus, Lena, focus. "Okay, listen-"</p><p>"- I'll send Brainy to meet you at your lab. We have an antidote but it is in a different facility outside the city borders. I need you to two to figure out a way to trace her in the meantime." Oh <em>thank God</em>. There was an antidote. That was good. Very good actually. That made things much easier for them.</p><p>"Nonsense, I am coming over. I will be able to work from there much better anyways. You have top secret espionage equipment after all," she said with no edge in her voice. It was true. They had the tools when it came to tracking down life forms, capturing them, locking them up. It wasn't an accusation, just a fact.</p><p>Alex hesitated again. It was so unusual to hear like that. The director of operations always had the answer to everything right at the tip of her tongue. But at times like these, not even Lena could think straight. She was getting more anxious with each second, her mind was racing a thousand miles. She prayed Kara wasn't hurt.</p><p>"Lena, I, um, I don't think it is safe for you to come. You should stay there, Brainy will be on his way very soon, okay?"</p><p>What was that supposed to mean? Why was she insisting on Lena staying there? She's been through much worse.</p><p>"What do you mean it's not safe?"</p><p>"You know what she means," a powerful voice boomed from behind her. She recognized it immediately and yet it still sounded unfamiliar. It was cold and sharp, nothing like Kara's normal voice, not even as Supergirl. Lena turned around with the phone still in her hand, the voice on the other line became background noise at the sight of her best friend. How did she even get in here? Kara was in her supersuit, leaning lazily against the door made out of lead and with her arms crossed in front of her. Somehow she looked much more muscular than usual and incredibly intimidating. Her blue eyes (from afar they almost looked grey?) were staring at her in an unrecognizable  way. It left her speechless and admittedly nervous. This wasn't Kara. <em>Her</em> Kara. The goofy reporter looked at her with love and admiration. Not <em>this</em>.</p><p>"Supergirl," she choked out. In return the woman in question rolled her eyes and straightened herself up. The smile on her face was anything but genuine.</p><p><em>"Please</em>, we both know it's a ridiculous name. I should have never allowed Cat or anyone for that matter to label me that. Call me just Kara from now on." It wasn't a request, it was a demand and Lena wasn't going to irritate her more than she already was. The youngest Luthor needed to get on her good side (oh the irony of it). So far, Kara didn't even attempt to come closer, which was good. There were things in this lab that <em>absolutely</em> shouldn't land in her hands. She hung up on Alex (the redhead would totally kill her for this) and put her phone on the table next to her. Respecting Kara's space, she didn't step forward but remained as calmly as she could on the spot.</p><p>"Everything is okay, we can talk about this. I am here for you. We can fix this together," she said with complete sincerity. She loved her best friend no matter what. She went to hell and back for her, killed her<em> own</em> brother for her and she would do it all over again. She loved Kara. Always had. Maybe <em>too much</em> but it didn't matter. She would never abandon her, not even when red Kryptonite was involved. It would bring things to the surface that would sting and Lena was ready to hear them. She knew the Kryptonian came all this way to <em>hurt</em> her, to say all the things she never thought out loud because Kara Danvers was too fucking pure to ever actually believe in them. Seeing the blonde in this newfound, angry state hurt the raven haired woman more than Kara could ever understand. It took losing her to realize how madly in love she was with her. All these years, everything she had ever done for her, it all made so much sense in hindsight. It was like daggers in her heart all over again, once Kara snapped out of this she would be so fucking devastated and broken and God, Kara was the last person on this forsaken planet to deserve all the trauma she had been through. It made Lena so angry.</p><p>But Kara didn't know all that right now. She simply scoffed and tilted her head. Her eyes zeroed in on Lena, they were so fucking cold and ready. Lena was prepared for the blow.</p><p>"Like we fixed our friendship? Or L-Corp or your relationship with your mother?"</p><p><em>Ouch</em>.</p><p>Her throat went dry and the muscles in her body tensed up. <em>Don't give in, Lena.</em> <em>She doesn't mean it. Don't let her get to you.</em> She forced herself to swallow the words down and shit did they burn. They burnt her badly, but she couldn't allow herself to believe them. Lena kept her head high.</p><p>"You know you can't hurt me."</p><p>An eyebrow quirked up, there was still this annoying smile on her godlike face, devoid from emotion. "What makes you so sure I can't?" It made the hairs on the back of Lena' neck stand up. It didn't sound like a threat but even worse, like a promise. Like she would absolutely do it if the raven haired woman challenged her. Lena had to stay on track and remain gentle. This version of her best friend was only waiting for an opening to strike, she was a predator who was waiting for Lena to make a mistake.</p><p>"Because I know you and deep down you know too that your heart is too good and pure to hurt anyone. This is not the real you who is speaking right now. But it's okay, we can fight it."</p><p>But the words only further fueled the Kryptonian's rage. She came forward with harsh steps. They echoed loudly on the ground. Her arms fell from her chest and for a second Lena thought she was going to pounce at her.</p><p>"If you knew me so well, you would have figured out my secret identity years ago. I thought you were smart. The <em>best.</em> Those were your words. And yet you couldn't even put two and two together."</p><p>She stopped at the foot of the table, not coming closer. Lena was thankful for the distance although she wasn't sure what Kara was planning inside her head. It was all so <em>off</em>. All of this was nothing like her. The Luthor still decided to be completely honest. It was perhaps a bit risky, given the current conversation but she needed to be honest with her friend. She deserved that even in this state of mind.</p><p>"There was no need to do that. I trusted you. I trusted that if there ever was a possibility that you had a secret like that, you would have told me."</p><p>Kara's jaw clenched tightly and her nose flared. She was clearly pissed but surprisingly not enough for the red veins to pop out which was weird. The words should have made her fume with anger. Instead, the blonde put her arm firmly on the table, probably denting it in the process and her upper body leaned forward so that they were closer now. But not too close. There was still a good distance between them. Maybe it was good to have a spacious lab after all.</p><p>"Oh yeah? You are so full of bullshit, Lena. I can't believe it took <em>me </em>so long to figure <em>that</em> out. You are always hiding. We both know you couldn't put two and two together because you didn't <em>want</em> to. It benefited you to keep Kara and Supergirl apart. You needed your loyal lap dog to be there for you whenever you needed her, without the fear of abandonment or disapproval. And Supergirl? She was a challenge for you, an exciting one to prove that a Luthor can be trusted. At the same time you used her to excuse your ideologies about alien weaponry. You never trusted <em>her</em> and that gave you the perfect reason to hide kryptonite, to recreate it, to use it. To do Rao knows what else behind my back."</p><p>Now it was Lena's turn to grow angry. She couldn't help it. How could Kara ever think or say that?! Her heart was slamming <em>hard</em> right now and there was a ringing in her ears. She couldn't even imagine what kind of anger Kara was feeling under the influence of red Kryptonite. But-</p><p>"That's not true and you know this better than anyone else! I never used a person for my own benefit. Especially not <em>you</em>." It only made the blonde laugh sickeningly. The sound cut right through Lena's anger, leaving her with a disgusting anxiousness in her stomach. Kara didn't believe her...she was taunting her even. Lena always considered her best friend's laugh the eighth world wonder. It was so genuine and bright, radiating so much love it was worth dying for. The youngest Luthor was more than once ready to die for it. But this laugh right now, it was just ugly. Heartless. Sinister.</p><p>"And you call me a liar. <em>You</em> always lie, Lena. To yourself, to me, to the world. I don't have a god complex, <em>you</em> have one. And you know why? Because you are just like Lex. Another Luthor who thinks she is great, gifted with a purpose to save humanity."</p><p>This is not real. This is not real. This is not real. This isn't Kara. Lena kept chanting that in her head but nothing could drown the voice that told her Kara was right. She was so right.</p><p>The poison was working, it was eating the woman of her dreams alive and Lena could do nothing but to sit and watch her transform into this <em>thing</em>. She had to snap out of her self-pity and doubt and get this right. Kara needed her right now. So with as much strength as there was still left in her, she kept her calm facade alive and responded coldly, "Why are you here?"</p><p>Kara examined her face for a good second, searching for weakness but Lena wasn't going to let her win.</p><p>"To tell you that I am once and for all done with you. From now on we are nothing but strangers, if I catch you toying around with things you shouldn't, I will personally come and take you down. I won't show any forgiveness for you again." She straightened herself up, now being significantly taller than Lena again and added more calmly, "And while we are at it, I never told you who I was because I just didn't want to. I don't owe you anything. Especially not something that you would have used against me whenever it was convenient for you."</p><p>And <em>that</em> was her mistake. It was the perfect opening for Lena to counter back. Because she knew this was only the Kryptonian bullshitting her right now, just to get a reaction. There was a wholly different reason as to why she never told the truth. They both knew it.</p><p>Lena answered without missing a beat, "You never told me your secret identity because you were selfish and scared." It came out harsher than intended but it did something to Kara. She felt the cut. She flinched for a millisecond before it was covered by a facade of anger and...panic? Her blue eyes widened slightly and she stepped into Lena's personal space in an attempt to intimidate her, but the shorter woman saw right through it.</p><p>"Scared? Of what?"</p><p>"Me leaving you. The possibility of losing me terrified you. Admit it. It never was about protection, was it? We both know I always was a target, knowing your identity wouldn't have changed it or made it worse."</p><p>Kara was quick to react, a little too quick for it to be natural. Lena had hit the hammer right on the nail and Kara was on full defense now. In an attempt to downplay Lena's words, she chuckled and looked away for the first time since she arrived.</p><p>"Yeah you really do have a god complex."</p><p>But Lena wasn't going to let go. She needed this advantage to prove to her that there was still Kara inside of her. That she had feelings and she wasn't a cold monster. Lena searched eye contact with the blonde, following her with a tilt of her head.</p><p>"Stop deflecting. You didn't come all this way to just tell me we are done. So what is it? Wanna get back at me for hurting you? Congrats. You did it. But what's next?"</p><p>She had pressed all the right buttons now but still got the wrong response. Kara fully faced her, completely stepping into her personal space. She was so close that Lena was hit by the hot exhale through her nose and eyes boring right through her soul. It all happened so fast.</p><p>"I will destroy you."</p><p>And just like that Lena was lifted off the ground and held bridal style in her best friend's arms. Surprisingly gentle at that. She didn't even had time to hold on to her because in what can only be described as a blur, she was transported from her lab up to the L-Corp quarters and through Lena's office balcony. Next thing she knew they were in the bedroom of Lena's penthouse.</p><p>Again, how did Kara even get inside?</p><p>Lena had no time to process anything, one second she was in her lab and now here. Kara carefully put her down, her hands grasping Lena's waist and arm in an absolutely soft manner in order to steady her once she was on her shaky feet. She was dizzy, disoriented and kind of nauseous. Her hair probably looked like a bird's nest too but who cared, right? Strong hands left her as soon as she was in power of her body again. Lena didn't want to admit it but she already missed the warmth they radiated on her skin, even through her clothing. Damn it, Kara was in no way or shape good for her right now and yet she still felt so fucking safe in her hands.</p><p>"Killing me in my own house? You're such a gentleman." Lena was sure she wasn't even really looking at the Kryptonian in front of her, things were still blurry right now. It took her a good moment to come back to earth. Kara for some reason found the whole thing incredibly amusing because for the first time since she burst into her lab, she actually smiled in a somewhat genuine manner. It almost made Lena cry. God, she missed her best friend.</p><p>"No one said anything about killing."</p><p>"Then why are we here, Supergirl?"</p><p>Yup, she shouldn't have called her that. The blonde's face instantly hardened. Lena had the desire to rub the sharp knit between her eyebrows away. She wondered though, what was the reason for Kara's sudden dislike for that name?</p><p>"Stop calling me that."</p><p>"Why does it bother you so much?" It came out so much quieter than Kara's words. Almost like a whisper. Even if this was not exactly<em> her</em> right now, Lena wanted to know the meaning behind this anger. For some reason it felt like so much more than just that. There was pain. The billionaire daughter could see it in the way those blue eyes almost shyly looked at her. Their bodies were still almost fully touching and Lena was certain Kara's heart was racing just as much as her own. She could <em>hear</em> the sharp intakes of air.</p><p>"I am not Supergirl."</p><p>"You aren't Kara either."</p><p>"Shut up!" She took a shaky breath and closed her eyes. Lena didn't flinch, didn't react at all. When the girl of steel opened her eyes again she said much softer, "Just stop for a second." It was like the real Kara had shone through. It took everything in Lena to not reach out and cup that angelic face in her hands. She continued then in a more controlled voice, "All these years, I have been oblivious to impure intention. Whether it was my own thoughts and desires, or everyone else's. I was naive like a child. But now everything is so clear. I can finally see through these eyes."</p><p>"What can you see?"</p><p>"I am not what everyone else wants me to be. I am not a hero, I never had to be. I convinced myself this was my calling but that's not true. I don't have to sacrifice myself and undo my parents mistakes just because I am here now or because I have extraordinary powers. I want to be selfish, do whatever I want and be whatever I want. They worship me like I am a God and I may as well be one but that doesn't mean I am obligated to do anything. In fact, Gods are as hedonistic as it comes. And you know what I want?" She reached for Lena's waist and pulled her against her solid front. What the fuck was happening right now?</p><p>"I want you. And I know you want me. I don't know why at this point but it is what it is," she said nonchalantly. </p><p>Nononononono.</p><p>This can't be happening. Not right now. It had to be a joke, right? All these years, all these fucking years and all these moments they shared together, and <em>this</em> is the one she has to chose to confess her feelings for Lena? Or more like <em>lust</em>. The shorter woman literally could feel her own heart breaking. Her chest was heaving in rage. What did she do to deserve this? Did it even matter at this point if this was the red Kryptonite speaking or not?</p><p>Lena felt completely drained. All she could do was shake her head and look up with a stone cold facade. She even managed to free herself from Kara's grasp without the blonde stopping her.</p><p>"<em>No</em>, that's not how it works. You don't get to dish me this half assed confession after everything we went through and then expect me to fall on my knees for you. You can leave right as you came."</p><p>The door slammed open in that exact moment and three men barked in with heavy armor. They were dressed in black, their faces were covered with a mask and there was a pretty good chance those rifles in their hands were very much real.</p><p>Also, how the fuck did people keep getting inside without the alarm going off?</p><p>In a swift movement Supergirl stepped forward, completely blocking Lena from the intruders. Her arms were posing on her hips, making her look bigger than she already was. But all Lena could think of right now was how did the girl of steel completely miss hearing them advance into the penthouse? Was she <em>that</em> preoccupied with Lena? As for why they wanted her dead, that didn't really matter. This was routine for a Luthor. It happened regularly.</p><p>"Hide behind the desk." Supergirl motioned behind her without turning around. She was wholly focused on the men in front of her. Lena did as told, not without making sure no one aimed at her on her way to the desk. The men were completely caught off guard by seeing the blonde hero in the penthouse. Please don't kill them, Lena thought. It would take ages to get the blood off the walls and carpet.</p><p>"It's Supergirl. What do we do?" One of the men whispered loudly enough for literally everyone to hear. The three men gave each other dumbfounded looks for a good five seconds before they simultaneously decided to raise their rifles and start shooting at the girl of steel. Why did they even bother? Lena threw herself under the desk and waited for the concert of assault weapon noises to stop. It was so goddamn loud, covering her ears didn't help one bit. Who the fuck sent those idiots, anyways?</p><p>Lena was not able to see at all what was happening but she could definitely <em>hear</em> how rough Kara was manhandling the assassins. Bodies flew across the room and slammed into the walls, cracking them in the process. One man even landed right on top of the desk before he was pulled by his leg and then most likely was thrown through the air.</p><p>There was a weird windy sound, almost like <em>woosh </em> before sudden silence fell in the room. Lena's ears were throbbing so much, there was no way she didn't suffer partial hearing loss after this. Then, the same windy noise came back and the whole desk was lifted and easily settled to the side. Superspeed. <em>Right.</em></p><p>The men were gone.</p><p>Kara knelt next to her best friend as Lena slowly sat up. The superhero put her hands gently on her shoulders, inspecting her for any injuries with such worry that Lena hadn't seen since Lex threatened to kill her weeks ago. She almost forgot that there still was red kryptonite inside of Kara.</p><p>"Are you okay? Are you hurt?" she said, her voice now completely different than before. It wasn't cold or harsh or even mocking. This was <em>Kara</em> speaking. She pulled her up and steadied her. They were chest to chest once more and Kara 's hands didn't leave Lena this time. She was safe. Everything was okay. This was just a normal day. Nothing out of the ordinary.</p><p>"No, I am fine."</p><p>But her mind was completely mushy. All she could do was stare into blue eyes, getting lost in them like she always did. They were looking back at her with just as much intensity. Her pupils dilated then, consuming the stormy blue in her eyes and the memory of what happened earlier hit Lena like a train. Could she trust her words? Did she really mean them? And even if so, what did that mean for their friendship? Right now, Kara looked like she was ready to fuck Lena on the spot and although it was very tempting, it wasn't the right time for obvious reasons. Not to mention, she still was hurt at the way she had to learn about her best friend's feelings. Why did life hate them so much? It could have been so easy. They could have confessed to each other like normal people did and talked things out, she dreamed about it so many times but no, of course Kara had to be exposed to red Kryptonite in order to speak out. It wasn't fucking fair.</p><p>The youngest Luthor didn't miss how Kara's eyes flickered down to her lips several times and it was almost adorable the way she could not bring herself to make the next move. Her features became so calm for the first time. It felt almost <em>right</em> the way they were in each other's space, looking at each other so longingly and with desire clouding everything around them.</p><p>"What are you waiting for?" It slipped out so naturally. Lena knew Kara wouldn't do anything to her. But she needed the blonde to realize it herself, to doubt and resist the kryptonite in her veins. Nothing in this world could turn her into a savage monster and that was a fact. Otherwise she would have hurt Lena a thousand times by now. She literally saved her without any hesitation.</p><p>The shorter woman had enough, she was tired of fighting against her heart. Maybe this wasn't the wrong time. Maybe this was <em>exactly</em> what she had to do. To break Kara free from the influence (this wasn't a fairy tale but a woman could dream) and to clear once and for all their feelings for each other. She raised her hands and held on to the muscular biceps of her best friend before she spoke up again, "Even with all this poison inside of you, you are still my Kara. My sweet, gentle Kara. You would never touch me without asking for my consent. You didn't do it before and you wouldn't do it now either."</p><p>Her words implied more than just that and Kara understood the double meaning instantly because her eyes went wide. She would never hurt Lena. Not without her<em> permission</em> at least. Lena's methods seemed to work, Kara was silent, dazed even.</p><p>The Luthor suspected that the Kryptonian's mind didn't even register the words that came out of her mouth so quietly just then, "Do I have it?" </p><p>Submission.</p><p>"You? Always."</p><p>Kara didn't waste a single second after that and leaned in, engulfing Lena in a deep kiss that knocked out the air in her lungs. Surprisingly, it was gentle in its firmness. It wasn't forceful or bruising her lips in any way. Kara's strong hand was placed around Lena's waist in an iron grip that wouldn't loosen up even if the world was about to end. The other one gripped the back of Lena's head, keeping her right there and then. Nothing could take her away from Kara.</p><p>Lena's own hands shot up to grasp Kara's shoulders, just for them to clasp behind her thick neck eventually. Her lips moved on their own, they knew they wanted this. They had been wanting this for so many years now. Since the first day the blonde walked into her office. It was a bittersweet feeling. They finally kissed. She finally knew that Kara wanted this just as much as she wanted it. But it was not in the way she hoped. It was just...lust for Kara and as painful that was, Lena had to bury these thoughts deep down if she wanted to keep Kara at bay right now. Fuck it, she also was too weak to resist her, no matter what excuse Lena told herself, she knew she couldn't stop the Kryptonian from kissing her, from making her feel so fucking alive. It was so easy to focus on the hot lips that were pressed against her own and with each second passing became more demanding. A slick tongue licked into her mouth then, asking for permission to slip inside and Lena almost completely submitted herself right there and then to the girl of steel. She could feel it in the pit of her stomach and how it was pulling her down, making her knees go weak. Her whole body was demanding for more contact and the throbbing between her legs was only growing. Lena had to force herself to remember why she was doing this in the first place and there was no time for fulfilling any sexual fantasies. This wasn't just for her own selfish reasons. Kara needed her help and now that the Kryptonian was tamed, Lena could buy Alex more time. So they kept kissing and Kara's tongue kept dominating Lena's in a fierce battle. It was all consuming and addicting just how powerful Kara's kisses were. They were screaming possessiveness without actually hurting Lena. At the end, the need for air was what separated them. Their eyes snapped open at the sound of their wet lips parting away from each other and Jesus Christ, seeing Kara completely flustered like that almost shut down the last two functioning brain cells in Lena.</p><p>But <em>boom</em>, a light bulb went on above her head as soon as she saw her dislocated desk behind Kara. Suddenly her broken mind was completely sobered up. Thank God for her paranoid ass because there were two emergency buttons just under the table surface. Kara wouldn't like either options but it was the only way to keep her, well, lets say<em> busy</em> until Alex arrived with the antidote. The left one would fill the whole room with canons that would instantly shoot at Kara (yes, they would hurt her and no, there was no kryptonite involved) and the right button would fill the room with a newly designed gas that would send the Kryptonian to sleepy land the second her nose got the slightest sniff of it. Of course Lena was going to choose the latter option, but she had to get to her desk first. Would she ever explain to Kara why she had those two specific buttons installed in the first place? Well yeah, but that discussion could definitely wait...</p><p>It was totally justified though. This was Lena Luthor, <em>many</em> people and aliens alike wanted her dead. She had to protect herself. So it was all good, really.</p><p>"Come with me," is all she said as she grabbed Kara's warm hand and guided them to her desk. Why make it difficult when it could be so easy, right? The girl of steel actually followed without any resistance and allowed the woman in front of her to lean herself against the wooden furniture and pull the buff frame into her soft one. Kara's arms instantly shot out and wrapped themselves around Lena. So far so good.</p><p>"Do you mean what you said? About wanting me?"</p><p>"Of course," Kara responded right away but her face distorted into confusion. "You don't believe me?"</p><p>Lena cupped the blonde's sharp face in her hands and the crinkle between her brows finally relaxed at the contact. "I do. I just-" Lena sighed mid sentence. How could she say this without pissing her off? "I never thought the day would come. That's all. It's still hard to believe." And the fact that the person she loved was under alien drugs that made her incredibly angry but there was no need to mention that. It actually seemed like Kara had completely forgotten about that. Lena really had to ask Alex about what kind of substance was inside that bullet because the way Kara was behaving didn't add up...</p><p>The Kryptonian silenced her with another kiss or more like a bite on her lower lip. It hurt slightly but it was enough to leave her fuzzy all over again. </p><p>The gesture felt almost domestic despite the way her own body sinfully reacted to it. It was less sexual and more teasing, which didn't make the situation any easier. In fact, it made the plaguing ache in her chest only worse. As bad as Lena felt, she knew what she had to do and she knew their time was over. Their little bubble had to burst. </p><p>The words <em>I am sorry</em> were laying heavily on her tongue but she swallowed them at the end. Kara would be quick enough to realize something was off about the apology, she would be fast enough to snap herself out of her haze and flee. There was only one thing Lena could do. She wished the circumstances were different, but there was no time to dwell on it now. They were never meant for normal things anyways, were they? Lena had to be smart, she had to say something that would soothe or at least distract the blonde for a few more seconds and there was only one thing that really could do that. At least she hoped so. It <em>had</em> to be. Otherwise, all these years, all their memories, it all meant nothing. A false perception of what their relationship truly meant.</p><p>She gently held Kara's face in place and pressed her lips fully on welcoming ones for one last kiss. She tried to savor it as much as possible because God knew what would happen once all of this was over. It was incredible just how the slightest touch of the Kryptonian's lips against her own was enough to wreck Lena. It felt like home, calming her nerves and sending them to overdrive at the same time. It was this newfound duality that ruined her in ways she couldn't explain because it held so much power over her. It was addicting just like her love for Kara who was kissing her like nothing in the universe mattered except for this moment. This kiss was less urgent than the other ones they had shared, it was slower and more sensual. It was so fucking intimate that the second they parted, the warmth left Lena's body and her lips went cold. Blue eyes were already on her when she opened her own, staring at her with such passion, it almost made Lena drop her plan. There were a million things written in this piercing stare, things that Lena wanted to so desperately hear out loud. All of this couldn't have been just lust, she realized. More and more of Kara's deep, hidden emotions were revealing themselves the longer she stayed in Lena's presence and it affected the Luthor just as much because she could feel the way her body was screaming at her to abandon her mission and pull the blonde closer to her. It was almost terrifying how both of them were so consumed by each other in that moment. Especially Kara. It was a miracle how <em>that</em> was even possible. From what Lena was told not even her own sister could get through to Kara when she first got into contact with red Kryptonite years ago.</p><p>One hand fell on the strong shoulder, rubbing soothing circles on it before she dropped it completely. Kara's focus was still fully on her, she wasn't suspecting anything. Fuck, Lena felt <em>terrible</em>.</p><p>The other hand shakily made its way to the desk behind her and her thumb hovered above the button on the underside of the solid desk surface. Here goes nothing.</p><p>"I love you. Please don't ever forget that."</p>
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